Brandon D Cartwright
2008-03-10 10:33:39 UTC
On Sun, 09 Mar 2008 18:03:36 -0700, Brandon D Cartwright
and violent sex offenders..
You claim to be a victim and only "played doctor" wit your sisters.
Am
playground?
You are back off of the PLONK status, Brandon-boy.
He is lamenting because *ONE* fucking mistake in his earlier life has
condemned him to being beneath the likes of *****YOU*****.
Well so he appears to say...but on further investigation it is just aIs life worth living under prop. 83?
I have been convicted of a sex crime. Long ago, when I was a kid, I
played "doctor" with my two younger sisters and now, here I am, charged
with "sexual assualt" and "child molestation". I have paid for "whatever
crime" I may have committed, did my time, finished parole with success
and accepted the fact that I will forever have to be deemed as a
"molester" and "predator". Since my release, I have worked so hard to
build my life, to be a "normal" citizen of the US even though I have to
register for life and be in a database for the whole world to see,
scrutinize and mock. Is this in itself not running afoul of the ex post
facto? Regardless of your response, it's okay, becase I have accepted my
fate and will accept the fact that I can no longer be a "normal" citizen
but instead a second class citizen. So many of us "sex-offenders" are
harmless. So many of us have long paid our debts. So many of us have
suffered humiliation, lost family, friends, sons and daughters because
we have this disgusting label. So many of us have lost our jobs, been
evicted, or simply cannot find work and shelter. Is this not good
enough!?
But now, with the advent of Prop 83, my heart bears the weight of a
thousand pounds. I can no longer even attempt to "paint" a smile on my
face and pretend everything is alright. I will be forced to move from my
home, to quit my job. I will be forced to be tracked like a wild animal,
to be badged with an ankle bracelet as if like the mark of the beast.
Satellite lifetime monitoring is mandatory for repeat sex offendersI have been convicted of a sex crime. Long ago, when I was a kid, I
played "doctor" with my two younger sisters and now, here I am, charged
with "sexual assualt" and "child molestation". I have paid for "whatever
crime" I may have committed, did my time, finished parole with success
and accepted the fact that I will forever have to be deemed as a
"molester" and "predator". Since my release, I have worked so hard to
build my life, to be a "normal" citizen of the US even though I have to
register for life and be in a database for the whole world to see,
scrutinize and mock. Is this in itself not running afoul of the ex post
facto? Regardless of your response, it's okay, becase I have accepted my
fate and will accept the fact that I can no longer be a "normal" citizen
but instead a second class citizen. So many of us "sex-offenders" are
harmless. So many of us have long paid our debts. So many of us have
suffered humiliation, lost family, friends, sons and daughters because
we have this disgusting label. So many of us have lost our jobs, been
evicted, or simply cannot find work and shelter. Is this not good
enough!?
But now, with the advent of Prop 83, my heart bears the weight of a
thousand pounds. I can no longer even attempt to "paint" a smile on my
face and pretend everything is alright. I will be forced to move from my
home, to quit my job. I will be forced to be tracked like a wild animal,
to be badged with an ankle bracelet as if like the mark of the beast.
and violent sex offenders..
You claim to be a victim and only "played doctor" wit your sisters.
Am
I that dispicable? Am I so worthless of an American citizen, a human
being, that even a zoo animal shall have more rights than I? For the
life of me, I try to see the light at the end of the tunnel, but the
mist and the fog hinders my view. For the life of me, I try to tell
myself that everything is alright, but the deepest part of me, my soul,
is telling me, no! It's not alright.
So then what is left? Absolutely nothing! This life that I tried so hard
to build amongst my shortcomings is now meaningless. Life isn't worth
living anymore.
Are you saying you have to move because you live close to a school orbeing, that even a zoo animal shall have more rights than I? For the
life of me, I try to see the light at the end of the tunnel, but the
mist and the fog hinders my view. For the life of me, I try to tell
myself that everything is alright, but the deepest part of me, my soul,
is telling me, no! It's not alright.
So then what is left? Absolutely nothing! This life that I tried so hard
to build amongst my shortcomings is now meaningless. Life isn't worth
living anymore.
playground?
Fresno
D.B
http://www.calsexoffenders.net/
D.B
http://www.calsexoffenders.net/
He is lamenting because *ONE* fucking mistake in his earlier life has
condemned him to being beneath the likes of *****YOU*****.
cut and paste from a well organized advocacy site for registered sex
offenders..or sex registrants as they call themselves..
IOW spam..
The conditions he complains of do not apply to anyone with his
purported history..but to repeat offenders and violent predators..
Which is beyond my comprehension, because there is nothing lower than
the dog-shit named Brandon Cartwright. But, our legal system says
that it must be that way...
Do you actually think violent predators and repeat offenders shouldthe dog-shit named Brandon Cartwright. But, our legal system says
that it must be that way...
NOT be monitored?
Do you actually think sex predators should be ALLOWED to wander around
playgrounds and schools at will?
It is people like you, Brandon, who are condemning this nation to a
very early grave.
Hitler would be proud of you, asshole...
Clearly you wish to politicize your depraved proclivities rather thanvery early grave.
Hitler would be proud of you, asshole...
acknowledge your sickness..but folk of all political persuasions are
concerned at the activities of pedophiles...
FYI Fascism is a socio-economic phenomenon and nothing to do with
pedophiles being free to assault children... or post videos of tem
being sexually assaulted to each other..
If you research his group you will see the pedophiles in it have
*very* different views of their behavior to you..who is so proud of
your sick urges..
THE BEGINNINGS OF RECOVERY
http://www.calsexoffenders.net/apologyproject.html
Expressions of regret by convicted sex offenders in prisons or
treatment groups across the country are being posted here at their
request in the hope that the people they harmed will be helped by
knowing that they suffer too. This because, in many instances, they
have no other way to make their apology known. Out of respect for the
privacy of victims, only initials are being used. Equally, the same is
being done out of concern for the personal safety of the writers.
Additional such offerings will be added as they arrive. This is where
recovery begins. This is where it starts. Any viewer of this site who
wishes to have an equally anonymous apology posted is welcome to send
it to: ***@californiaregistrants.net
Convicted child molester 'how blessed I was to have a daughter'
Dear K., I wish I could have been a better daddy to you...please know
that what I was doing to you was and is wrong. My selfishness also
forced you to keep secrets from mom and your brother and everyone
else. You did not deserve that.
It is not your fault, honey. You are still precious and also very
valuable. I pray daily for God's grace over you...you are the bravest
little girl I know. Thank you, "K," for telling mommy what I was
doing...Through open eyes I can truly see how blessed I was...to have
a daughter...
Love, Dad
R.G. Wisconsin state prison
Convicted child molester 'not even I know why'
Dear A. and M., I wish to God that I should not have to write this
letter. The truth is that unfortunately I must because through my
actions I have hurt you. Although I know that nothing I can say will
take away the pain I have caused to both of you. There is nothing that
I can do to recompense for all the wrong I have done. All I can do is
ask for your forgiveness and pray to God that one day you can find it
in your heart to forgive me. And please believe me when I say that if
I could, (I would) give my own life to take away all the pain I have
caused to everyone involved.
A., I must come to you first because it is you whom I betrayed. I
stole away your innocence when all you were looking for was a father
figure to love you...I want you to know that I have been praying for
you every day since my arrest. I pray and hope that God will grant you
the strength to become a better man than...I.
M., I don't even know where to begin. We have been friends since
childhood yet I betrayed that friendship. You entrusted me with your
most precious possession...I wish I could help you understand why or
how I could have done the things that I did...but I can't...There is
no excuse. All I can say to you is that I am sorry. Sincerely,
T.M., Michigan prison
Convicted child molester 'an overwhelming flood of sorrow'
Dear K., I've been needing, wanting, urgently anticipating having the
opportunity to write this letter for a long time. I sincerely
apologize, form the very essence of my whole being, and before God. I
am so very sorry that I offended your mind, soul and body...I am
deeply apologetic to what I have done to you and your family...
I am hoping that by at least apologizing to you some amount of healing
will result...please know that I am sincere. From the moment I
offended you, I felt an immense and overwhelming flood of shame and
guilt, something I feel to this day. This shame and guilt has
propelled me on an ever expanding journey to find out who I am and
what could have caused me to harm another human being...
If I had known that the abuse I endured as a child would effect how I
dealt with relationships...I may have been able to prevent my causing
harm to you. I admire you for your courage. I am glad that you told
someone. You did the right thing. You have allowed me to confront a
problem that could have become much worse. Since my incarceration I
have had the oppportunity to understand sexual abuse...I did not know
how wrong it was until I had a chance to learn about it. ...it will
not ever happen again to another person.
...it was not your fault at all that I chose to harm you. ...I used
drugs and alcohol to escape the pain of (my own) confusion and of
confronting who I was. Instead of escaping the problem, the drugs and
alcohol brought out a part of me that I had buried. Also desensitizing
myself with pornography...
As I revisit my life...I have no qualm with paying the penalty of
prison for my actions, rather I look upon my penitence as a
blessing... Please accept my apologies...I wish with every fiber of my
being that you have a happy, healthy and safe life from here on...
Most ever sincerely, S.R., New York correctional facility
Convicted child molester "I was the one sick."
Dear --
This letter is difficult to write as it's hard to know where to start.
I'm writing to say that I am sorry for the things I did to you and the
pain I caused. I want you to know that it was not and is not your
fault. You did nothing wrong. You were a child and deserved to be
protected. I was the one sick and with the problem. You trusted me as
children trust adults and I violated that trust by abusing you.
Please know that I am working hard to change my life and I know that
the only true "I'm sorry" is to never hurt anyone again and I am on
that journey.
M.M. Minnesota secure treatment facility
Convicted sex offender "I am sorry for breaking that trust between
us."
Dear J,
I want to start off by saying I'm sorry for everything that I have put
you through. I'm sorry for breaking that trust between us. I should
have known better and I should have treated you with more respet than
I have shown you. I am sorry for putting you through that pain and I
truly hope that you are doing well with your...son you do have. I hope
you get joy out of him (and) that your counselling sessions have been
able to help you through your troubles and pains.
I want nothing but the best for you and that you deserve some
happiness in your life. I hope that you will have a blessed life and I
pray for you everyday.
M., California state prison
Multiple sex offender "Dear Victims..."
Dear Victims: Since entering treatment and genuinely engaging in all
aspects of the treatment program I have been able to consciously
recognize and accept the effects of my crimes...I do sincerely regreat
all the misdeeds of my past life and...I seek avenues in which I can
make amends.
...My future endeavors will not be for personal gain, but to bring the
word to others in an informative manner to hopefully help thwart
future victimization. This is my goal and my promise to you.
Sincerely,
J.D., Minnesota correctional facility
Convicted Child Molester 'May I become only a dim shadow in your
memories'
The words "I am sorry" do not begin to properly express my feelings of
guilt and shame that I have for my crimes against you and your
family...I do not and cannot ask you for your forgiveness. I deserve
none...Were it possible, I woul gladly take back each harm, each
injury, and all the tears and sorrows that I brought into your life.
You did nothing to deserve all of that.
...it is my hope and prayer that you...are successful in everything
that Life has brought to you. Indeed, it is my most sincere and
heartfelt hope that you do not even think of me. That I have become no
more than a dim shadow in your memories...
M.R.H., Wisconsin state prison
Incest Offender 'fulfill your purpose in life'
Dear J and B, It's been six years since my arrest and I've spent most
of my time in prison trying to understand how I could have molested
you both while at the same time claiming I love you...Please forgive
me. I am so very sorry for what happened.
...when I was five years old some neighbors started molesting me...I
married your mom thinking she would meet my emotional needs...I only
took from her without giving back. I caught your mom in an adulterous
affair...I fell apart and..I molested you...
As you know, when you said stop I did. It was like a light came on and
I was suddenly ashamed.
I am so very sorry. I really didn't mean to hurt you...I'll always
love you and am with you in spirit. I pray for your inner healing and
trust that you will fulfill your purpose in life.
J. California state prison
Convicted child molester "To the child I hurt"
I pray that you will know that in your heart I am sorry for all the
pain I have caused you. There is much I have taken from you. I know I
can't erase all the tears and heartache. Know that everyday I spend in
prison I spend praying for you.
Know this: that when I took you in my arms, gave you a hug and broke
down in tears and told you how sorry I was-- knowing you accepted what
I told you meant a lot to me. Everyday that I live in prison I live
for you and for future generations. I refuse to make excuses for the
ills I have caused you...only love and prayer for healing for you. For
me and you, for our family and society as a whole and the world as a
unity.
I long for the day I can show you my sincerity and allow you to know
the sorrow, heartache and sympathy I have for you...Please don't give
up on yourself or your dreams.
The following are passages out of the Bible I have written down in
hopes you can read them: Psalms 103:5, Psalms 103: 17,
Isaiah 54:13-14. God bless you.
G.M.S. Wisconsin state prison
Convicted child molester "I apologize for the assaults that I
committed against you all."
I apologize for the assaults that I committed against you all. I want
you to know none of those acts forced upon you were ever any fault of
yours. I manipulated you and groomed you to gain your love and trust
only to betray you. I had no right to rob you of your innocence.
I apologize for using you (and for my) cowardly sexual assaults...I
apologize for not treating you as a human being. I apologize for
threatening to harm your loved ones if you did not comply with my
demands.
I apologize for all of the pain, embarassment and humiliation my
assaultive behaviors have caused to all of you, members of your family
and friends in the community.
E.J.L. Oregon prison
Convicted child molester "My father committed suicide after
molesting a 14-year old girl."
Dear D.S., I'm writing to apologize for what I did to you and offer my
best wishes as you move forward in life. I know the emotional and
psychological harm I caused you when I molested you and videotaped the
incident has had a negative impact on your life...I also convinced you
to lie to the police so that I wouldn't be arrested. When I continued
to buy things for you, I was hoping to keep you from ever telling on
me....
I'm sorry for molesting you and for the pain I caused to you and your
family. I know that you will never be able to forget what happened
that night, but I do hope you will be able to forgive me at some
point.
At first, I didn't realize the pain and hurt I caused you...However,
in court your mother made me realize just how much harm I caused you:
that you have had many difficult times at home, and in school...a hard
time with relating to adult males. I'm so sorry for what I did to you
and pray that you can get the psychological help you need.
I've dealt with an attraction to young boys for most of my life and
wish that I would have gotten the help I needed...I remember telling
you about my father committing suicide...(h)e was accused of molesting
a 14-year-old girl. I was about your age at the time. (It) messed me
up for some time.
...I will never try to make excuses for what I did to you....My goal
in life now is to make certain that I never again molest, and hurt,
another person. I have begun therapy, and will continue to do so for
the rest of my life...I'm doing everything I can to prevent this from
happening again...I also truly hope you can get professional help so
that you don't ever cause harm to anyone.
I wish you the best...apologize for the pain I caused...hope that you
will be able to forgive me. Sincerely,
A.B., Michigan correctional facility